Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

• Monday Night Raw #1376, October 7, 2019!!

THIS TIME, I CANNOT CUSS YOU GUYS.

You guys are 100% right – WWE F**KED UP. But they did the moment they made this a Universal Title match knowing FULL WELL they were not trying to give the belt to Wyatt. I don’t think there should have been a title on the line. It would have been so much easier for creative. On top, maybe they SHOULD have given Braun Strowman the title as well. That way, he could fight a more relevant match. On top, AEW brukk up NXT in the ratings, but that was only because that was AEW’s debut, so OF COURSE they were gonna beat NXT that week. You think Triple is worried? Don’t be stupid man!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW #1376! Despite all that, I STILL don’t complain on the internet you know why? I just found out that DAS EFX are coming out to the UK. I STILL WIN!

Digestive chocolate chip fused with caramel biscuits and a coffee… LET’S DO THIS SH!T!

Interesting – knowing that the fans are pi$$£d about the Hell In A Cell… they decided to recap what happened with Bobby Lashley, Rusev & Lana.. VOLUMES!

How the f**k is Lashley wearing Rusev’s robe? Meanwhile I’m tryna figure out if Lashley upgraded from Kristal – his former wife because she was baaaaaaaaaad! In fact – what went wrong?

How the f**k is ‘Rusev’s house being shown on WWE’s titantron? Oh my sh!t Lana got on lingerie, she has succumbed to the sexual chocolate… a wheelchair is on order as we speak! have you still got Summer Rae’s number Rusev????

GRANT BODY-P!

LAWWD HAVE MERCY she’s taking off her bra…look at Lashley killing full set of teet!

Oh snap she’s feeling his tingz as well…

Randall and Corbin are DEDDIN!

Rusev has gone KRATOS on Randall and Corbin!

Hey Lacey – if you’re gonna take out the trash (in your case Natalya)… don’t you want to do it properly like Vincent Kennedy did?

Look a Lacey sitting down crossing her legs while the ref counts to 10 on Natalya…. God Damn Lacey! Just give me ONE NIGHT with her…

No way there was real trash in that can! Aaaah man can you imagine the smell?

They’ve took it to the stage, after all that beaten… Natalya manages to powerbomb Lacey through the table off the stage! BLAOW! That has GOTTA BE IT surely!

OHHHH SNAP!!! TYSON FURY UP NEXT! Let’s start building those big BIG WrestleMania storylines from NOW!

Hold on a second – Tyson Fury says Braun will get these hands if Braun doesn’t apologise? A wha di rarse?!!!!

The arrival of Tyson Fury and Cain Valasquez has officially put me off getting WWE2K20… ok the truth is I can’t afford it!

Do you know what amuses me? The way WWE make out that USA Network & FOX want the best superstars on their roster… if WWE REALLY want to convince me – they should have the executives of the networks be live on the show and do their draft picks!

Aleicester Black amuses me – he wants to know who wants to pick a fight with him…. you do know that Tyson Fury is in the house don’t you?

WTF? The Singh Bros? They look like a pair of battyman! I seriously considering taking a power nap y’all… I’ll be back in an hour…

OH NO! Braun says the same thing about Tyson Fury! All we need now is Vincent Kennedy in the middle screaming “YOU RUINED IT!!!”

GRANT BODY-P!

So Cain Valasquez is some sort of relative to Rey Mysterio & Dominik?! MI RARSE! You learn something new everyday!

Can’t believe I’m saying this but The Miz has actually dressed proper this time!

Look pon 10-time women’s champion Charlotte Flair.. she may have no batty and fake t!TT!£$ but I bet she is flexible as f**k in the bed!

As for sexy Lynch – I give her ratings because she understands the Japanese language… I sincerely hope she doesn’t let Asuka spit the poison mist in Becky’s sultry face!

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Becky had the dis-arm-her locked in on Kairi Sane! And Asuka used the poison mist! This is a saaaad day…Becky’s sexy face is ruined! Can you imagine when she rides on top? OH LAWWWWWWWD!

So it looks like The Kabuki Warriors have turned heel, it’s just that the fans aren’t getting used to that fact!

NOW they are showing the highlights of the Hell In A Cell match…worst ending ever? Not sure about that but as soon as you put a title in the equation you have essentially f**ked it up.

OH SNAP! TYSON FURY! This is gonna be good!

Let’s run the Floyd – Big Show storyline again! I’m with it! Tyson got Braun though! “I’m the heavyweight champion of the world… how many titles have YOU WON?”

HERE WE GO!!!! Security won’t be enough! Just waiting for the rest of the locker room to come out now!

The whole of security got spark out! Aaaah sheeeeeeeet!!!

I’M GONNA KILL YOU!!! YOU’RE GONNA HAVE TO!!!!

If all this is for the Crown Jewel joint, I’m gonna say this – I’m looking forward to this sh!t!

 

DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE OR/AND THE SMACK TALK CENTRE.